January 30, 2022

JAN 30, singable satire: "STEM CELLS; DON'T LET YOUR DAUGHTER_CELLS ... "


PARODY-LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys"1975,  (covered by) Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, August 2013. 








STEM-CELLS, DON’T LET YOUR DAUGHTER-CELLS GROW UP AS MEATLOAF
(to the tune of "Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys") 








 








Intro:
Cowboys have shortened lifespans, and unhealthy lifestyles -
They won’t heed diet or pills, yet give you their smiles.
Smoking in pool-rooms and tinned sloppy-Joes and a breakfast of chicken-fried steak
They won’t understand cloning, why the dogies have gone - 
 Steers and cowboys may both fade away.

Cow-cells in vitro don’t moo, but they ain’t hard to clone.
Myocytes [1] can be lined up, much like neurons or bone.  
Conveyor-belt ‘Dolly’s, on packing-house trolleys might frighten consumers like you.  
PETA surely will grouse if calves have to die young
To make BSE-free [2] beef Ragú.

Stem-cells, don’t let your daughter-cells grow up as meatloaf;
Don’t let ‘em be Big Macs or mulligan stew,
Make them be sirloins or prime ribs ‘au jus’.
Stem-cells, don’t let your bovine genes morph into burgers;
They’d sure land up bunned, and likely be shunned by
Lovers of côtelettes-de-veau.

Foodies like trendy new bistros and fresh local produce
But this Steak Tartare from the lab shouldn’t get 'em uptight.
Abattoir workers feel threatened,
But coliform runoff and tainted meat lessened,
'Gene cuisine' - it’s all protein; for the future a blessing
To feed 8 billion souls every night.

Stem-cells, don’t let your offspring get smothered in goulash;
Don’t let ‘em be Big Macs or mulligan stew,
They’d feel more ‘mignon’ as prime ribs ‘au jus’.
Stem-cells, don’t let your progeny flower into burgers;
They’d sure land up bunned, and likely be shunned by
Lovers of châteaubriand.


[1] myocyte = (isolated) muscle cell
[2] BSE = bovine spongiform encephalopathy, “mad-cow” disease

January 29, 2022

JAN 29, hellenophilia: Santorini wines







 Other verses discussing our appreciation of Greece and things Greek can be found on our blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE.





January 28, 2022

JAN 28, pathos and poetry (gun control verse): anger and guns




 You can review our entire poetic outpouring on this important topic by proceeding to a post on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'; click HERE.

January 27, 2022

JAN 27, reprehensible modern history: 'clannishness' negated







 View the entire collection of poetic assertions on this topic (currently small, but growing) at our more encyclopedic blog 'Edifying Nonsense', by clicking HERE.

January 26, 2022

JAN 26, reptiles: amphisbaenians






Authors' Note: 

clade: taxonomic term, equivalent to ‘suborder’

   The amphisbaenians are a group of reptiles named for the Greek mythological figure Amphisbaena, a two-headed serpent. Superficially resembling earthworms, but with similar markings about their tails and their small heads, they spend most of their time in a subterranean environment. Although they are  widely found in South America, the Caribbean region and Africa, their current distribution in North America and in Europe is more limited, involving only Florida and Iberia respectively.
    
   The motivation for the alleged fevered search by Slovenian crowds to find these creatures is unclear.
   The suffix -paenia, or -penia, (PEE-nyuh), not infrequently used in medical terms, indicates a lack or deficiency.



You can review these illustrated verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Verses about Reptiles' on the full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'.

January 25, 2022

JAN 25, funny bones: hook of the hamate




Authors' Note: The hamate bone, one of eight small bones of the human wrist, has a prominent hook, or hamulus, that provides some protection to the ulnar nerve as it proceeds down the arm to supply the fourth and fifth fingers. A 'hairline fracture' of this bony process (outcropping), not an uncommon injury in golfers, baseball players and hockey slap-shooters, may result in continuing pain. Frequently, the injury is not detected on initial x-rays, but may show up on computed tomography (CT), a bone scan, or on follow-up wrist X-rays.


 You can view verses on this topic in a wider context by proceeding to the post 'Breaking News: FUNNY BONES' on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE!


links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the post of your choice.


January 24, 2022

JAN 24, dental feelings (sentimental verse): implants




Authors' Note:  'Desert' in this sense is the last refuge of an obsolete usage, meaning 'that which is deserved'. Modern writers, unaware of this ancient but persisting idiom, sometimes mistakenly write 'just desserts'. 


You can review the collection of illustrated verses on this topic by proceeding to the post 'Dental Feelingson our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'.


links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the post of your choice. 

January 23, 2022

JAN 23, wordplay maps: Scramble-towns, 'postal supplements'

Everyone around the planet joins in sending Dr. JJ wishes for a speedy recovery!










You can get into the sequence of earlier wordplay posts on this topic by following these links  .... 

LINKS to other nonsense in this series: 
Back to the previous Canadian map, eh?
Default to U.S.A. map #21 (final American version)

links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your year and then  your month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the blogpost of your choice.


January 22, 2022

JAN 22, neologism (classic): snafus at Fulton's 'Gnu-Bar'










 

If you liked this submission, you might want to refer to our entire collection of verses about human and animal denizens of bars, pubs and other watering-holes. Click HERE.


January 21, 2022

JAN 21, limerick variations: singable limericks


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                             Thanks to MMH for providing the photo, taken in Honolulu.


You can review our entire collection of poems on the topic of "Limerick Variations" as compiled on our more encyclopedic blog "Edifying Nonsense"; click HERE.  

January 20, 2022

JAN 20, singable satire: The Soggy Bottom Boys sing "JAILHOUSE NOW"

 PARODY COMPOSED: Dr. G.H. and Giorgio Coniglio, March 2019.

ORIGINAL SONG: "In the Jailhouse Now", Jimmie Rodgers, 1928, recorded by many artists, including Webb Pierce, Merle Haggard, Chet Atkins and Leon Russell; a somewhat different version was recorded by Johnny Cash. Most recently the song, as performed by Tim Blake Nelson and The 'Soggy Bottom Boys' appeared in the filmscript and on the soundtrack of the Coen Brother's film "O Brother, Where Art Thou?". Check out the YouTube video HERE. 
PARODY-SONGLINK: To find ukulele and guitar chord-charts to help you accompany "Jailhouse Now" on your favorite instrument, click HERE.




JAILHOUSE, NOW


(to the tune of "In the Jailhouse Now")


I had a friend named lobbyin' Paul;
Misdemeanors? really quite small -- 
He helped out Putin's vassal in Ukraine.
Got up the nose of Mueller
His sentence just got fuller;
(He'd worked a while on Trump’s ‘Sixteen campaign).

A witness-tamper tale; they done revoked his bail.
Those judges learned the facts
'Bout mortgage fraud and cheat-on-tax --
He's in the jailhouse now.

Paul warn't no copperator,
As Mueller found out later,
Paul figgered he'd get pardoned by the Chief.
His partner Rick keeps scattin',
There's some that call that rattin',
Rick knew that Paul's the one who'd get relief. 

Gates worked for presidents,
But turned 'state's evidence',
A short time will be spent
For launderin' and embezzlement.
He's in the jailhouse now.

Ah di o-dalee eehee hee
Ah di o-dalee eehee hee
Yode layee-hee
Yode layee-hee
Yode lay-ee.

Before 16's election
Don’s standard for selection
Was helpers that were loyal and quite tough.
They'd had some indiscretions,
But unlike Jeffie Sessions,
They wouldn't chicken out when things got rough.

Good guys like Michael Cohen,
Mike Flynn and Roger Stone,
And here I'm being blunt.
Collusion? No, it's a witch hunt.
Let’s lock up Hillary soon.

Repeat yodelling chorus.

January 19, 2022

JAN 19, poetic Panama palindrome parody: ' ... Ipanema'

 


Authors' Note: 

pizzazz: an American neologism, first used in the 1930s, for vitality, sparkle or flashiness

Carioca
 is a long-established nickname for the city and the residents of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Ipanema is a section of that city, known for it's bossa nova music, and for its iconic beach.

As explained in the verse, we have the classic palindrome (reminiscent of the Panama concoction):
Amen, a pit — Ipanema, and its many variants.

Newer variants include: Amen, a pizza, jazz — Ipanema, and
Amen, a piece — Ipanema.






You can review the whole collection of our illustrated verses on this topic  by proceeding to 'Reversing Verse: Panama palindrome parodies' on the full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'.

And, if you are interested in seeing innumerable examples of spoofy palindrome variants on wordplay maps, you could embark on a journey through a collection of  blogposts entitled 'Tourists' Palindromic Guides: The Americas, #1 -#4'. All that's needed is to click on the link.



January 18, 2022

JAN 18, mammalian wildlife: kri-kri (Cretan goat)







 You can review the whole collection of illustrated verses about mammals (both domestic and exotic) by checking out the more extensive post on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE !

links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your year and month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the post of your choice.

January 17, 2022

JAN 17, palinku (poetic novelty): puzzling and magic palindromes

   In this post, we continue with a novel form of poetic wordplay. Inspired by Japanese haiku poetry, this new form is used for a terse verse with a total of 17 syllables displayed on three lines. Unlike its classic Japanese analogue, this concoction does not mandate the precise distribution of the syllables among the three lines, but does stipulate that each word in the poem be included in a palindromic phrase or sentence in English (i.e. one that can be read either forwards or backwards). 

  To help the reader discern the origin of the lyrics, each palindrome (generally occupying one of the three lines of the poem) has been color-coded. The current post should be regarded as experimental; readers are referred to other posts in this collection for a review of the standard format.

   And, just in case you have forgotten what palindromes are about, your blogsite hosts have arranged a serial set of brief lessons on the topic ('Political Palindromes') which you can review by clicking HERE


palinku




palinku


The enhanced second slide shows the poetic content in the form of only two palindromic phrases -- these are both 'magical palindromes'; indeed they are lenthy , but they allow the synthesis of ideas that would not otherwise be possible with regular paindromes. You can get up to speed on this intriguing wordplay variation by clicking HERE.   

 You can view all our "palinku" verses if you proceed with a single click to our more encyclopedic blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE. (Or if you prefer, you can stay on this particular blogsite and look for the offerings for the 17th day of each month -- there are now more than 60 of these.)

links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the post of your choice.


January 16, 2022

JAN 16, death and the afterlife: giving up the ghost

 EDITORS' WARNING: You must be at least 12 years of age to read this post! 




 You can review more poems about 'Death and the Afterlife' in context on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE!



January 15, 2022

JAN 15, waterfowl: juvenile night herons

 


             
You can review these illustrated verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Immersible Verse: Limericks about Waterfowl' on the full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. (Or, if you prefer, you can view them on Facebook in Giorgio's photo-albums).




January 14, 2022

JAN 14, toxic vignette: lethal drugs of abuse



 

Authors' Note: Occasionally, the shock of reality may help a victim of substance abuse, like Seth, to focus on his plight. A more professional discussion of drug addiction by SheilaB may be enlightening.


January 13, 2022

JAN 13, limerick for lovers of classic languages: yukky Roman foods

 



Authors' Note: 

gigeria: Latin term for the delicacy 'cooked bird entrails'; forerunner of the old French term gisier, from which our use of gizzard is derived

garum: highly popular Roman sauce made from fermented fish intestines, used equivalently to our catsup

Gourmands in ancient Rome were notorious for their consumption of exotic (and in modern terms yukky) foods of all sorts.

To review all of our output on the topic of classic languages, go to our encyclopedic compendium, "Edifying Nonsense"; click HERE !


links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, and select (by clicking) the month and then the specific post of your choice.

January 12, 2022

JAN 12, portraits of couples: pigeons

 


You can view all of our folio-photos from the collection of 'Couples' portraits in a wider context on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE.

January 11, 2022

JAN 11, review of 'brief sagas' from 2021

 A NOTE from the EDITORS: 

 As readers may have gathered, this blogsite highlights several types of light, wistful and humorous reflections on current life, chief among them being short verses using the limerick format, more or less (see the blogpost "Limerick Variations"). But on occasion, we feel the urge to continue important themes through several stanzas worth of poetic ideas. So in this post, we highlight the previous years' offerings of 'lengthier' poems of at least 15 lines or 3 stanzas. We have been publishing these at the rate of once a month on this blog ("Daily Illustrated Nonsense"), but as they are found mixed with shorter verses of five lines, i.e. standard limericks, or even three lines, (palinku --palindromic haiku), you might have failed to notice and review them in their entirety. 

  This summary gives you a second chance to explore these lengthier creations that contain as many as 6 stanzas -- hardly lengthy enough to be considered a genuine saga, but we hope reflecting the authors' sagacity.  

  The compressed mode in which our 'sagas' are displayed may enhance your appreciation of the range of topics covered; if you prefer to enjoy the details in a larger and more readable font, you can quickly access the posts on this blog devoted uniquely to their stanza-by-stanza display (as well as notes, related photos and videos), by entering their title into the search lines provided. And from there, you can, of course, explore further to enjoy the multitude of really short verses -- i.e. five lines or less.  





































For the curious reader's convenience, we have sorted our treasury of 'brief sagas' by the year of publication on this blog. Altogether, you will find more than 40 whimsical poems, that cover about 800 lines of verse. 

Click below, and enjoy!
2020
2021
2022
2023.



January 10, 2022

JAN 10, a brief saga (pill-poppin' poems): drug development










  For the purpose of this blog, a 'brief saga' is defined as a poem, usually narrative, but occasionally expository, that tell its story in at least 15 lines. Most commonly, the format involves three stanzas in limerick form, constituting a single submission to the online humor site 'Omnificent English Dictionary iLimerick Form'. On the OEDILF site, rigorous standards for content and format are involved in a collaborative editing process that may take several weeks to over a year. 

  Generally, OEDILF has not been enormously welcoming of multi-verse submissions, but Giorgio Coniglio has persisted, and the OEDILF number for each accepted multiverse poem is shown here on the slide with its first verse. 

To access the next 'brief saga' on this blog (February 2022), proceed to Attribution to Ogden Nash'
To access the most recent previous 'brief saga' (December 2021), back up to 'Avian Digestion'.
To access all of our 'brief sagas' by the year of their creation, click on your selection below.