NOV 20 (2022), singable satire: Johnny Cash sings "VLAD PUTIN'S BLOGGER"

 PARODY SONG-LYRICS

ORIGINAL SONG: "The Frozen Logger", an American folksong of the tall-tale variety, was written by James Stevens in 1928 and published in 1949. It has been recorded by The Weavers in 1951, and subsequently by many other artists, including  Oscar Brand. Enjoy the YouTube recording by Johnny Cash here. 

PARODY COMPOSED:  Dr. G.H. and Giorgio Coniglio, February 2019. 

PARODY-SONGLINK: To access ukulele chord-charts to help you accompany "Vlad Putin's Blogger" on your favorite instrument, click HERE.

FURTHER INFORMATION: A presidential quote from January 2019, in reference to the suspected perpetrators indicted by the Mueller probe into foreign interference in the 2016 U.S. federal election...

 "Among the 34 people, many of them were bloggers from Moscow or people who had nothing to do with me, had nothing to do with what they were talking about or there were people who got caught telling stories or lying … I think it's a terrible thing (that has) happened to this country, because this investigation is a witch hunt." 

VLAD PUTIN'S BLOGGER

(to the tune of "The Frozen Logger")

As I logged on in Moscow in an internet café,

An English-speaking pop-up troll did these terse words display,

“We know you are a blogger, and not just a common nerd.

Mother Russia wants your hacking help, of this please be assured.”

“And yes, I am Vlad Putin; please excuse my being crass,

But we’ll count on your assistance, or your relatives we’ll gas.

What we ask’s not too much effort, in fact it’s a walk in the park.

We’ll assign a friendly mentor, KGB-trained oligarch.”

“I want to win real elections, just not keen to call my own;           

We’ll monitor the chats and thoughts on each U.S. cellphone.

You’ll scoop the goods for blackmail in a world as dark as night,

And steal e-mail for WikiLeaks to publish on their site.”

“We’ll post you there in Washington, you’ll help us get the clues;
When time is right to dominate, we’ll start our world-wide coups.

We’ll signal in that courtroom that Putin’s time has come;

That’s where you’ll sit ‘til someone moons Bob Mueller with

his bum.”

NOV 19, Italian loanwords: ghetto

Authors' Note:

libretto: Italian for 'little book'; a summary of the text distributed to the audience of an opera, mass or oratorio.

gondola (plural - gondole): the stereotypic Venetian small boat, poled down the Venetian canals; gondole-ly is a personal, incorrectly-stressed Anglo-Italian neologism

imperfetto: Italian for 'imperfect' or 'flawed'

 The ghetto first appeared as a section of the city in which members of a particular ethnic group were cordoned off, in Venice's working-class Cannaregio quarter in 1516. The word ghetto is of uncertain origin, possibly derived from a term in the local dialect for 'foundry', related to a nearby factory. The region of northeastern Italy that surrounds Venice, stretching from the Alps to the Adriatic Sea, is known as (the) Veneto.

You can review our entire poetic outpouring about Italian loanwords by proceeding to a post on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'; click HERE.

NOV 18, classic palindromes: 'Ida's denial'

You can review these illustrated verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Reversing Verse: Limericks About Classic Palindromes' on the full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'.

NOV 17, Canadiana: Canadian weather

Authors' Note: 

hinterland: a geographic term for 'interior', derived from the German adverb hinder = 'behind'.

The author contends that the summary he received overemphasized the adverse climatic conditions faced by Canadians, the majority of whom live in the more temperate southern portions of the country.

mid-November in Toronto

You can review poems, pictures and diverse nonsense related to Canada on the post "Canadiana" on our full-service blog  "Edifying Nonsense". 

NOV 16, scopes of modern medicine: bronc(h)oscopy

Authors' Note: SheilaB, a physician and prodigious creator of limericks at the OEDILF web-site, defined the bronco ("unbroken horse"), and would have been perplexed by my confusion with the homonomous Greek root broncho- ("windpipe"). Certainly, we would all need to call on our veterinarian colleagues to learn more about the investigation of respiratory maladies in horses. Bronchoscopy is a fairly commonly performed procedure in diagnosis of human lung disorders.

The unrelated term honcho ("group leader", or "boss") is of Japanese derivation.
 

NOV 15, signs of confusion: first collection

 

half-way between the Battery and the beach

This post is the first in a series of 5. You can attempt to get all of this straight by reviewing the collections in these subsequent posts ...

signs of confusion #2

signs of confusion #3
signs of confusion #4

signs of confusion #5

NOV 14, higher connections: gnostic

Authors' Note: 

gnostic: adjective derived from the Greek noun...

gnosis: pertaining to or possessing spiritual nowledge or insight

NOV 13, patients and their maladies: amblyopia

 

Authors' Note: 

pas-de-deux: a term, originating in French, for a balletic performance with two dancers, often moving in unison

Amblyopia includes a number of conditions in which the single affected eye provides less useful information to the brain, resulting in suppression of that information in comparison to that from the more normal eye. Double vision or strabismus (crossed-eyes) from weakened eye muscles on the one side is a common cause. When strabismus is relatively minor, the persistence of two discordant images under certain conditions with resulting double vision, may be disconcerting to the adult patient. Reduced lighting, head position and fatigue may enhance the problem, but corrective prismatic lenses may help in reachieving integrated binocular vision.

You can view these verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Nurse-Verse: Patients and their Maladies' on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE!

NOV 12, objectionable adjectives: efficacious

Authors' Note:  The author disavows overly blunt speech and writing, but finds the tendency to embellish disconcerting. Efficacious seems to be used disproportionately when effective or efficient would do nicely. Other words with inflated frequency of usage include symptomatology, methodology and, yes, even usage. 

You can review our editorially selected doggerel (eight verses) relating to 'Objectionable Adjectives' by clicking HERE. 

NOV 11, death and the afterlife: memorial service

 

 You can review more poems about 'Death and the Afterlife' in context ('death and the afterlife') on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE!

NOV 10, a brief saga: Leigh Mercer's palindrome workshop

Authors' Note: 

Ipanema: (pronounced ee-pah-NAY-muh in Portuguese): trendy neighborhood in Rio de Janeiro, known for its marvellous beach and for its bossa nova music

Leigh Mercer (1893–1977) was credited with the iconic palindrome, A man, a plan, a canal — Panama. Mercer, an isolated British eccentric who worked at low-level jobs with frequent turnover, occasionally communicated with journals and contest organizers about wordplay and mathematical puzzles. After his death, notebooks filled with unique palindromes were discovered.
This early workshop conducted by Mercer, during which the iconic canal palindrome is almost invented, is fictitious, but with the exception of the first, all the italicized phrases in the 'workshop' session are legitimate palindromes.

 For the purpose of this blog, a 'brief saga' is defined as a poem, usually narrative, but occasionally expository, that tell its story in at least 15 lines. Most commonly, the format involves three stanzas in limerick form, constituting a single submission to the online humor site 'Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form'. On the OEDILF site, rigorous standards for content and format are involved in a collaborative editing process that may take several weeks to over a year. 

 Generally, OEDILF has not been enormously welcoming of multi-verse submissions, but Giorgio Coniglio has persisted, and there are now over 90 of these multi-verse poems feature in his "Author's Showcase". The  OEDILF number for each accepted multiverse poem is shown here on the slide with its first verse. We have been blog-publishing these poetic adventures here monthly.

NOV 9, patients and their maladies: the hemorrhoid

  

Authors' Note: 

pro tem: frequently used short form for the Latin 'pro tempore' -- for the time being, in the short term.

Readers might also enjoy a verse on the same topic presented in September 2021 in the collection "The Bottom Line of Medical Humor". Click HERE.

You can view these verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Nurse-Verse: Patients and their Maladies' on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE!

NOV 8, urban concerns: school districts (glowingly)

Authors' Note: Real estate agents are masters at the psychology of selling of homes. They employ 'stylists' to 'stage' houses, first by decluttering, and then by adding grace notes to indicate the putatively carefree and desirable lifestyle of the owners. In this case, a Victorian-era home with an appallingly small outdoor space was staged to appear more attractive to families. 

Our collection of illustrated poems about "Urban Concerns" on our parent blog "Edifying Nonsense", contains a number of intriguing verses that you can access by clicking HERE.

NOV 7, ecto-parasites: hog lice

Authors' Note: This agricultural pest, Haematopinus suis, commonly known as the hog louse, lives its life only on porcine hosts, with the larvae (nymphs) concentrating on the head region. Apparently, infestations of swine herds can be treated easily with avermectins, a class of veterinary antibiotics.

 You can review Giorgio's other verses about pesty and occasionally beneficial insects, as  collected in 'Buzzwords: Verses about Insects' on the full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE (and keep following along 'til you get to the section on ecto-parasites).

NOV 6, bar-fauna: Hamlet at the pub

If you liked this offering, you might want to refer to our entire collection of verses about human and animal denizens of bars, pubs and other watering-holes. Click HERE.

links for any date: scroll over to the calendar-based listings of 'Past Posts' in the righthand column on this page, choose your month of interest, and then select (by clicking) the post of your choice.

NOV 5, defining opinion: hostility

Our blogpost "Defining Opinion" on the topic-based blog "Edifying Nonsense" shows a selection of similar verses submitted to OEDILF (the online Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form). You can see all of these on one visit by clicking HERE.

NOV 4, mythed opportunities: Eos (Dawn's endless night)

Author's Note: The asteroid known by astronomers as 221 Eos is apparently a large orbiting body with a diameter of over 100 km. It has a potential, should it strike the Earth, to bring about an extinction similar to that produced 60 million years ago that wiped out the dinosaur population.

  Like most heavenly bodies, this one was named after a figure from Greco-Roman mythology, Eos (Aurora), the Goddess of Dawn; the irony is apparent. Click HERE for another nonsensical poem about Aurora/Eos and learn more about the legend.

You can take advantage of the whole spectrum of illustrated poems dealing with 'Mythed Opportunities' that we have collected on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE!

NOV 3, American satire (prolongation): Espionage Act

 This post is CLASSIFIED! (proper security clearance is required)

We hope that you enjoyed this verse. You can find 40 more on this topic in 6 collections on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE to start! 

NOV 2, binomial phrases: "first and last"

 Authors' Note: Binomial expressions combine two paired elements in a fixed order. Lists of these phrases show that when the two genders are in question, males almost always come first. This bias is shown in dozens of idioms such as boys and girls, lords and ladies, men and women, brother and sister, kings and queens, Jack and Jill, etc.

The few notable exceptions highlight a gender-constrained role for women, including belles and beaus, bride and groom, and moms and dads.

Gender-bias in language is also discussed in another verse by the authors. Click HERE. 

To review our total collection of poetic effusion about binomial phrases proceed to our blog 'Edifying Nonsense', click HERE ! 

There is also an entire collection of lyrics to patter songs, somewhat older material, dedicated to various kinds of binomials, that provides more didactic material and an extensive series of examples, and allows you to sing these expressions for your own enjoyment, or for that of others around you. Click HERE !

NOV 1, palinku (poetic novelty): conformity and timidity

  In this post, we will continue with a novel form of poetic wordplay. Inspired by Japanese haiku poetry, this new form is used for a terse verse with a total of 17 syllables displayed on three lines. Unlike its classic Japanese analogue, this concoction does not mandate the precise distribution of the syllables among the three lines, but does stipulate that each word in the poem be included in a palindromic phrase or sentence in English (i.e. one that can be read either forwards or backwards). 

  To help the reader discern the origin of the lyrics, each palindrome (generally occupying one of the three lines of the poem) has been color-coded. 

 And, just in case you have forgotten what palindromes are about, your blogsite hosts have arranged a serial set of brief lessons on the topic ('Political Palindromes'); click HERE. 

(Ed. note:) Verses of this ilk have continued to accumulate. You can view them all at one swoop if you  proceed with a single click to our more encyclopedic blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE.

(Or, if your prefer, you can view all this material on Facebook  in Giorgio's photo-albums.)

OCT 30, Toronto oases: Rouge national park

OCT 31, dental feelings: Hallowe'en Verse for a dentist friend (sugary treats)

 

You can review the entire collection of our illustrated verses on this topic by proceeding to the post 'Dental Feelings' on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'.

OCT 29, classic palindrome: 'mix a maxim'

Authors' Note: It is unclear why Max finds the maxim more worthy of indulgence than the tenet; the latter, it is noted is a palindrome. And so are Egad! an adage, and Mix a maxim, delightful phrases that may be found in lists of classic palindromes.

You can review a collection of such illustrated verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Reversing Verse: Limericks About Classic Palindromes' on the full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. 

OCT 28, Toronto ravines: floating islands at the Brickworks WIP

technical glitch transferring videos remains unresolved.

Sorry.

See other views of Toronto's Brickworks HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE.

 

OCT 27, objectionable adjectives: 'estival' and 'hibernal'

Authors' Note: In English there are fortunately many nouns that we can use as adjectives when the situation demands. In the opinion of this author, summer (adj.) and winter (adj.) are less cumbersome descriptors than estival and hibernal, despite the opinion of some lexicographers. 

You can review our editorially selected doggerel (eight verses) relating to 'Objectionable Adjectives' by clicking HERE.

OCT 26, limerick variations: O'Malley's concept (C-rhyme extension)

 Author's Note:  Well, yes. This verse does go on at length (including a D-rhyme extension), but in a highly regulated fashion that would have been applauded by the famed lyrical seer and his followers. Support by a cadre of Irish disciples had materialized initially, but to O'Malley's bitter disappointment, was unsustained globally.

 You can review our entire collection of poems on the topic of "Limerick Variations" as compiled on our more encyclopedic blog "Edifying Nonsense"; click HERE.  

OCT 25, mythed opportunities: Galatea (and Pygmalion)

Authors' Note: The ancient Greek myth about the Cypriot sculptor Pygmalion was recounted by the Roman poet Ovid in his epic work "Metamorphoses" in 8 CE. The name of Pygmalion's self-crafted ivory love-object was not recorded until French romanticists picked up the issue in the 19th century. In 1871, the British comic playwright W.S. Gilbert composed a modernized spoof in blank verse, "Pygmalion and Galatea", that became a successful hit, as did Pygmalion, George Bernard Shaw's 1913 theatrical contribution, and its musical and cinematic adaptations (1956 and 1964 respectively) known as My Fair Lady.

The illustration is taken from a drawing by Gerome done in preparation for his iconic painting "Pygmalion and Galatea".

You can take advantage of the whole spectrum of illustrated poems dealing with 'Mythed Opportunities' that we have collected on our full-service blog 'Edifying Nonsense'. Click HERE!

OCT 24, patients and their maladies: brain symptoms post-trauma

Authors' Note:  In American football, 'rushing' means running the ball after starting behind the line of scrimmage, not including forward passes. The play continues until the player carrying the ball, usually a backfielder, is tackled.

 

You can view these verses in a wider context by proceeding to 'Nurse-Verse: Patients and their Maladies' on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE!

OCT 23, STD-poetry: monkeypox

Authors' Note:   In June 2022, the World Health Organization announced that

it would find a new name for 'monkeypox', to de-emphasize its overstated enzootic connection.    

You can review verses on this topic in a wider context in a post on our full-service blog "Edifying Nonsense" by proceeding to the post 'Ruination, Rumination and Reminiscence: STD-Poetry'. Click HERE. 

 

OCT 22, planet-saving verse: phosphate detergents

Authors' Note: 

Detergent is a Latin-derived term for a product that 'wipes away' dirt.

You might be interested to review our recent post about the dishwasher as a residential appliance.

You can help save the planet by viewing all our verses in this series at "Edifying Nonsense". Click HERE!