Authors' Note: Director Robert Altman had initially requested music for a single scene in the 1970 movie M*A*S*H; in keeping with the plot, this was to be "the stupidest song ever written". Having difficulty in completing the lyricist's task himself, Altman called on his 14-year-old son, who presumably finished the job in a few minutes. The music for "Suicide is Painless" went on to become highly popular as the principal theme for the movie and the TV series; the lyrics are not widely known, but earned the junior Altman large sums in royalties.
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